SATIRE – APRIL FOOLS

One day, I was just sitting in my lair (it’s not an evil lair, just a normal lair) thinking about how Gonzo is the best Muppet, when a bang and a white light just appeared out of nowhere then it was gone. In its place was a box that was literally calling my name, “Marie open the box.” When I finally got the courage to open the box a familiar song started to play. 

“Golden years, gold, whop, whop, whop.” Then as the music slowly faded the same voice started to speak, but this time louder and with a hint of excitement. “Let’s Dance!” For one night only at the fabulous Cajundome. Inspired by the success of Taylor Swift’s Eras Tour the ghost of David Bowie has decided to do his own Eras show. You, lucky fan, are one of over 13,000 fans to attend this exclusive experience. Coming to the dome Feb. 29.” 

I was absolutely excited because I heard some rumors brewing on the Ouija Board, but I never really believed them. However, the ghosts weren’t pulling my leg. I was going to see David Bowie as a ghost perform. 

So, I waited anxiously for that night to come and then it came to the date. I took my trusty jetpack (cheaper than a rideshare) to the Cajundome. It was a regular “Drive-In Saturday.” Everyone was in “Fashion” like their favorite Bowie era, and as I walked in the air was buzzing with excitement. 

As I found my seat, all the lights dimmed then that same white light came back with multi-colored lasers following it. Then a familiar voice came over the speakers, “Hello all of you “Young Americans” are you ready to rock!” Are you ready to “Rebel Rebel” tonight?” The room then came alive with cheers to the point my ears were ringing. All of a sudden Bowie appeared on stage. He was kind of translucent because he’s a ghost. 

The first era he performed was, of course, one of his most well known, Ziggy Stardust. This part of the set I wish was “Five Years” longer, but sadly all good things must come to an end. I enjoyed the part where the ghost band’s guitarist did a guitar solo. 

Ziggy was just the beginning of a night to remember. There were more fireworks than I could keep up with. In all my years coming to the Cajundome, I have never seen it like this. “Time” did not seem to pass while I was in the venue. The air was electric with excitement. 

There was a “D.J.” spinning records in between the apparitions of Bowie. Sometimes, I thought I saw other ghosts in the audience or maybe it was my mind playing tricks on me. We may never know. 

Anyway, sorry for getting sidetracked. Back to the main event. I was at the “Speed of Life” for the next part of the show. A spectacle happened when he shifted into his next persona everyone gasped at what they just saw. 

We were getting into one of my favorite Bowie eras, the mid ‘70s. A lot of classic albums come from this period. The crowd went more wild as he started playing the hits. Rumor has it that a special guest was going to appear and everyone was wondering. Maybe all will be revealed at the finale of the show. 

On stage he, was jumping and singing, then a “Blackout” happened and the audience gasped with surprise. What had just happened? Was the concert over? Or was it just some elaborate trick to get people to go to the Cajundome? Then suddenly that white light was back and “Ashes to Ashes” started to be sung. Everyone forgot about what just happened. 

We were now in the ‘80s and the hits kept on being performed. I could not believe I was chosen to experience this once in a millennium event. I never had a “Sense of Doubt” that this was real. I pinched myself and it did feel real. Sometimes I did wonder if I was having some elaborate dream and my alarm clock would wake me any second. 

At every second “Changes” were happening with the songs. It was hard to keep up, but as the concert went on longer it became easier. The concert was a combination of both “Sound and Vision” all coming together in perfect harmony. 

I was wondering if this night would ever end, but I did not care, I was having too much fun to care. I began to wonder “What in the World” happened to get me to the moment that I am seeing the ghost of David Bowie perform? 

The end was coming near, I could feel it in my bones. An air of anticipation was becoming apparent. How will the ghost of Bowie finish this epic night? All of a sudden the beginning of “Under Pressure” and, all of a sudden, the ghost of Freddie Mercury appeared. He was the special guest everyone was talking about. The crowd went more WILD! 

Finally, the lights came on and the ghosts disappeared. As I walked out of the Cajundome I was hit with the bright sun. 

I wondered how long I had been there and will it ever happen again?